January 7, 2011 § Leave a comment

As I was decorating chinese new year cakes at Mama’s house today, I suddenly remembered what it was like to be happy. My grandpa rolling dough and pressing out shapes for the cake on my right, and my grandma and me decorating the cakes.

And when I look up, I sometimes see a bird I’ve never noticed perched nearby. It is the closest I can ever get to a unique bird. Right beside my grandma’s backyard, there is this big tree where the birds congregate. The birds chirp ever so loudly and continuously as we make the cakes, so much so that sometimes I think they are having a really decent conversation. A moment or two, I had the thought that maybe I could understand them.

Later I slept to the lullaby of sounds my grandparents make while working in the kitchen. It seemed entirely possible then to forget that I have grown up already.

I think God has been reminding me that I’m still a child. There are birds I’ve never seen, with conversations I can only guess about. Yesterday when I went to Hort Park, I discovered that there are plants with flowers that pop, or whose flowers look like flames.


There are thoughtful plants, with a landing pad for the flying insect to gather nectar from the flower.


There are plants with flowers so shy they make themselves small and hide behind their leaves.


The world looks new. My grandfather laughs. A family ponders which camera to get. A little boy drops his toy cars but derives fun from picking them up. Books that I read as a child are re-discovered. I bring home an onion which sprouted shoots to grow.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

What’s this?

You are currently reading happiness at renebeams.


%d bloggers like this: