January 10, 2011 § Leave a comment

I am supposed to sleep now but I have a queer feeling in my tummy. I think that queer feeling is my reluctance to pull myself away from the crafting I’ve been engaging myself in this holidays and going back into…umm, stuff I do when I’m in school.

I really want to do crafting full-time. It’s going to be tough though, especially when one is just starting out.

But what else can I spend a whole day fully engaged in, so much so that I forget the time and mealtimes just pass me by?

At 3 something I got a bit guilty, because I was so intent on customizing the look on my blog that I didn’t want to say the 3 o’clock prayer just yet. I went to hang some clothes and then sat down, closed my eyes and brought myself into his presence. I thought about mercy, about the need to ask for mercy. Then I imagined me beside Jesus as siblings, and God sending Jesus to the cross for something I had done wrong. It occurred to me as terribly unfair, and for just a little moment, I felt that I needed to be punished, and wondered why Jesus wasn’t angry with me. I would, if I were punished for something someone else did wrong.

I went back to my tasks after the short reflection, glad that I had it, but also wondering if the impact in me would last long enough for me to want to apply it. Perhaps the same reflection should be done over days, or months.


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